Posts Tagged ‘coaching’

Taking a Pause for Integrity

Tuesday, November 27th, 2012

I woke up today feeling disappointed and very upset as I checked my iPhone for updates. No additional registrations had come in during the night for Wednesday’s EFT class. It was time to pull the plug and cancel. Doing so was admitting failure and also realizing that maybe people don’t even care about energy self-care.

As long as I was facing reality this morning, I decided to step on the bathroom scale. I knew that the number would be up, but when I saw the reading, I recoiled in disgust. I guess there is a very real reason my clothes have been tight. Ouch! Why had I been so careless these past two weeks? With the holidays approaching, is it even possible to imagine that I could burn off those pounds and the 2 extra inches I have gained around my middle? An ugly reality for the author of Winning at Waist Management to admit, but it is the truth.

Pity parties are not my thing, yet here I am feeling embarrassed and out of integrity. Could there be a way to turn this into something to benefit others as I get back on track? Is there a holiday gift wrapped up in this mess?

As I completed my workout on the elliptical trainer this morning in a desperate attempt to change the situation, I thought to myself, “What else would a great coach recommend to turn this situation around?” It was time for a pause, a quiet mind and refreshed focus. As I meditated in my office, the answers were soon flying in.

It occurred to me that I always get great results for my own life and a smaller waistline when I teach what I know. What if I was to begin a series for people to take the waist management journey with me during December when there are so many challenges? Could we all be better off and ahead of our game when 2013 rolls in? Are there other ways I use my talents to help others make the best of this last month of 2012? My calendar said yes. A program could be produced. It could be a series set up as an automatic course with live support and a private FB group too. Would my connections like this? Would they want this sort of a holiday gift?

Here’s the program I have in mind:

1. Begins on Monday Dec. 3 and runs through Dec. 28

2. Participants will receive a daily email with a topic and a resource such as a video, article, tracking tool or self-care process.

3. We will cover a variety of issues such as diet, exercise, emotions, beliefs and handling personal challenges. I will pull from my 21+ years as a lifetime member of weight watchers to bring depth to the discussion.

3. On Wednesdays at 4 PM EST (Dec. 5, 12, 19 and 26), there will be a live 45 minute call for questions, discussion and checking in.

4. A private FaceBook Group will be established for all members of the program as a forum for sharing ideas, support and resources.

5. The cost for the entire 25 day program is ONLY $9.95 (just 40 cents a day!) for those who enroll between now and Friday Nov. 30. After that, the price increases to $39.95 – which is still less than $1.60 per day. Indigo Connection Premium members are invited to participate FREE!

6. All program enrollees will be entered into a drawing for 4 hours of private EFT or energy makeover coaching with me, which can take place any time in 2013.

7. Satisfaction Guaranteed

If you want to be part of the December 2012 Energy Makeover Waist Management Journey, enroll online at http://dec2012waistmanagement.eventbrite.com/ I look forward to taking this journey with you.

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Posted in Goals and Resolutions, Health & Wellness, holiday, Inspiration, Reflections on Life's Challenges, Uncategorized | Comments Off

Mastering Fear……by Facing It

Thursday, January 12th, 2012

Yesterday I received a very powerful reminder about fear that brought me to attention. After giving a luncheon seminar for the YWCA Leadership Series, one of the audience members came up to me and told me that we had met on June 21, 2010 at a Ladies Who Launch Meeting. I instantly remembered that night too. It was the longest day of the year and Susannah Goulder was the speaker. My long lost friend told me that she remembered how I stood up that night at Susannah’s urging and shared a big dream in front of about 50 witnesses. I had told the group that I was writing a book called Energy Makeover and that I envisioned myself being interviewed about the book on the NBC Today Show with Ann Curry. Boy that was courageous and outrageous! What was I thinking?

While I had long forgotten that moment at the LWL program, this kind woman had only a few moments ago learned that Energy Makeover had not only been published, but also had become an Amazon Best Seller. She was thrilled for me because she had been on this journey with me since June of 2010 and just had to speak up. My heart was warmed by this experience and I was also reminded of all the fear I had to overcome these past 2 years. Maybe I hadn’t been on the Today Show, but so many big dreams had come true.

What if I hadn’t faced my fear when…..

1. Being an author in Next Top Spiritual Author Contest required that I make and submit a video at a time when I did not think I had access to a video camera, tripod, editing software or a clue how edit or post something on YouTube. I learned what I needed to learn, released my need for perfection and did it anyway!

2. I had to ask every soul I knew to watch my imperfect video and vote for Energy Makeover on the Next Top Author Contest web site when I was embarrassed about being out there on YouTube and unfamiliar with Facebook, LinkedIn, Twitter and Social media in general. I learned to navigate social media, build my online network and get over my fear of being judged and criticized for revealing what I really look like and what I believe. I advanced to round 2 in that contest and more importantly created the foundation for future outreach and an online presence I never before imagined.

3. I didn’t advance to the final round in The Next Top Author Contest and felt I wasn’t good enough to be an author. I learned that I needed to hire a coach to get me motivated and inspired to get Energy Makeover completed. My coach, Ann McIndoo inspired me to share my unique message and taught me a great process anyone can use to write a book in 90 days in the midst of a busy life.

4. The Energy Makeover manuscript was finished and I realized that I could not let another soul edit or read it because I was afraid of judgment and criticism. I learned to shift out of the fear by seeking support. After scheduling a brief session with Coach Ann, I took her advice and on that same day hired a professional editor, rallied the help of 14 volunteer editors AND found a publisher. Later I was sensible enough to hire Peggy McColl to coach me on launching a book on Amazon and Holly Matson, a wonderful assistant to manage the book launch project.

5. I was flatly refused by many of the book launch partners I had hoped and assumed would be willing to help with the Energy Makeover Amazon launch. I learned, through my coach Peggy McColl, that I should forge ahead with the launch, keep asking and that it would all work out. That was the day I forgave myself for being such a control freak and decided to put it into God’s hands.

The existence of Energy Makeover and the events of this week would not have happened if I would have stopped at any of the “fear moments” mentioned above. It has always been my job to notice the fear, step into it and realize that fear simply brings forth an opportunity to learn and grow.

I must also admit that Energy Psychology and Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT) have been part of my fear-busting arsenal at every step of this journey. When I find the intensity building, I now more quickly recognize it and begin clearing it.
While fear can be very isolating, I also know to connect to a higher power and the outside world for help and expertise when I feel like shutting down.

There is a fork in the road at each terrifying moment that gives you the choice to isolate or connect. Connection is the only answer. Where there is connection, there lies a happy ending.

Practice Time: Ask yourself each day if there is something you aren’t doing because you are afraid of judgment, criticism, or some other nasty outcome? Have the courage to examine what you are really afraid of, use a self-care process like EFT to soothe your feelings, take a moment to pray as you ask who might be out there as a resource for you. In every case of fear, there is a resource waiting to respond to your need. Your burden will become so much easier once you are aligned with the intention to move forward.

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Minding the Emotional Intensity of Life

Tuesday, November 29th, 2011

As I prepare to lead a new book club call this week on the topic of Creating a Journal, I am reminded that journals are a place where we must reveal, pour out and examine our emotions with a sense of curiosity. So many people come to me seeking guidance on life purpose these days and my belief is that emotions are the answer. Emotions play a critical role in helping each soul navigate the big life lessons that bring true purpose to our unique mission as a human being.

Many coaches don’t delve into emotions as much as I do, preferring to leave that to licensed therapists. I must step up and say that coaches, especially someone like me who has specialized training in Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT) or other energy self-care processes are a most appropriate resource for a healthy clients seeking to honor their emotions as part of a balanced self-awareness plan. EFT is an incredible tool for restoring balance of energy flow and creating a sense of well-being. What I love most about it is that it becomes a powerful self-care tool that helps you deal with emotions as they come up with a new sense of confidence.

Much of my coaching practice is about empowering clients to recognize and balance their energy by working with emotions for guidance. More often than not, the energy drains and blocks my clients report can be traced to emotions that have been repeatedly stuffed away for days, weeks, months and even years. You can’t heal what you don’t recognize. Stress and physical symptoms only compound as emotions get stuffed away. Having intense emotions does not mean that you are sick, mentally ill or depressed. Emotions mean you are human!

It is time to realize that each moment of extreme emotional intensity, whether it is a high blissful state or one of agony, teach us about who we are, what we value and what kind of path we are on.

Honoring Emotional Intensity in Your Journal
Consider beginning a process to document your emotional peaks and valleys each day. I suggest the following each morning as you reflect on the previous day:

1. List 3-5 of your peak “Intensity Moments” each day and identify what the emotion you felt was. Rate the intensity on a scale of 0-10. Intensity moments can be scenes of pure joy, gratitude, fear, worry, rage or anger just to name a few. They are the highest peaks and the lowest valleys. Some days you will have more of one extreme than another. If you don’t have much intensity some days, that is fine too. (I find this usually happens when I am on vacation and totally relaxed, which is interesting indeed!) Pay attention to the most intense things, be honest about what you feel, give them a name and a number rating.

2. Comment about how you dealt with the feeling. If you used a healing technique like EFT to process a painful or unpleasant emotion, jot down a note about what you did and how you felt after your self-care treatment. If you medicated your intense emotion with food, alcohol, cigarettes, surfing the internet or shopping, you might also want to admit this in your journal. Also jot down a note if you celebrated an emotional high through expressing gratitude or by sharing your joy with someone else.

3. Is this feeling or scene revealing your unique part of a bigger picture? Consider what this intensity is telling you about who you are. When your core values are disrupted or challenged, you will be agitated. When your values are served, you will feel calm and wonderful. Allow these intense feelings to reveal your mission, purpose and inner longings. As you use emotions to know yourself better, you will recognize how your unique nature fits into and helps you serve the world around you. It may take a few weeks to begin getting a sense of this, so instead of hurrying the process, simply witness and reflect on it.

You are here to be uniquely you, emotions and all. Pay attention and you will awaken a new way of understanding your deepest truth.

Want to learn more about Emotional Freedom Techniques, energy self-care and using a journal to as part of your personal energy makeover? The basic EFT sequence and several treatment scripts can be found in my book, Energy Makeover – A Conscious Way to Stay Young, Have Fun and Get More Done!. Join my mailing list at www.theindigoconnection.com to learn more about group EFT events or call 440-238-4731 to schedule a private EFT coaching consultation by phone.

Disclaimer: The information contained herein is educational in nature, is provided only as general self-care guidance and is not medical advice. The information presented is not intended to be diagnostic or substitute for obtaining medical advice or psychological care. Please consult with your physician or licensed practitioner.

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Creative Pauses

Tuesday, September 27th, 2011

I was listening to an audio recording of an interview with a successful author and blogger in my car yesterday and soon started feeling guilty. You see, this individual was talking about how he blogs every single day and I was realizing that I have been very spotty at blogging lately. I have frankly found it hard to come up with ideas that inspire me to write them down. I also haven’t been using my video camera for blogging much either. A cloud of “should” started to descend over me.

“Am I going through a creative dry spell, or is this a deliberate pause?” I asked myself. Considering that I just finished writing and editing a book, certainly that could be my excuse. Another excuse could be that I have been videotaping quite a few client sessions lately as part of my professional certification requirements, so I hardly feel like video blogging after all of that. A final reason could be that it is natural and normal to pause in the creative process. That’s the reason I will claim as my truth today.

The question now is what I might do during this pause to acknowledge it, accept it and possibly change it. I have a choice. If I was coaching a client to rekindle that creative spark, I would recommend the following:

1. Recognize the slump and forgive yourself for it. Consider it a time of renewal, rest and for appreciation of past creative successes. In my own case, receiving the first copy of my printed book last week was such a delicious experience. How nice it was to stop everything that day and savor a proud moment.

2. Commit to action. Nothing will change unless that next step is taken. Decide what you will choose to do. Even if you don’t yet feel creative, setting the intention will help it happen. I am setting the intention to create at least one post a week, beginning now.

3. Show up at a productive time of day. Identify the time of day you’ll most likely get something creative done and show up for work then. It’s much harder to force a creative plunge when the environment isn’t supportive. For me, the best time for writing means first thing in the morning, when it is unlikely that I’ll be interrupted. I’ll schedule this time in my calendar, beginning with today.

4. Ask for inspiration. This can simply happen by opening yourself to reflect on life around you. Inspiration may come from meditation, prayer, a TV show, a scene from the day before or an intense feeling you have about something you see, hear, dream about or read.

5. Create and release. Not everything you write or create will be prophetic, wise or brilliant. If you are a blogger, you know it makes sense to publish something on a regular basis so as not to disappoint your readers. Decide to stop being such a judge and let someone else see your work, even if you don’t think it’s the most awesome thing you have ever created.

Today I’ve made a new commitment to get back to my blog more often with a renewed sense of faith that the ideas will flow. There will be a new video coming to the blog soon as well because I have committed to leading a workshop at the COSE Small Business Conference on Oct. 20 about using videos. It makes a load of sense to have some fresh material. I am open to receiving inspiration on content, so please feel free to drop me a comment or an email with your ideas.

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Posted in conscious business, Inspiration, Reflections on Life's Challenges, Uncategorized | 1 Comment »

Two Tips for a Monday

Monday, October 11th, 2010

Two Energy Tips for Monday Oct. 11

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Progress – The Shrinking Alien!

Friday, September 10th, 2010

On August 3, 2010 I posted a blog titled “Taming the Alien” regarding my own battle with the mid-life belly bulge and recommendations for waistline reduction. I’m pleased to say that I have been practicing everything I suggested in that article, and it’s working! I have lost 1.25 inches from my waist, dropped 5 pounds and feel exceptionally well. You can do it too.

I must warn you however, you won’t get results like mine unless you take responsibility and make a change or two in how you conduct your daily life.

Each person must decide their own path to change. Some people do well with sudden radical changes, while others need baby steps. The key is finding changes you can live with in the long term so that they become automatic habits.

Below are some of the changes that have helped me get control of my middle:

1. I found accountability and group support in this process by attending weekly Weight Watchers meetings and by leading a Waist Management with EFT class for a group of fellow business networking friends. My sister also joined Weight Watchers which allows me to cheer her progress each week too. Good coaches know how significant that accountability can be. It is important to have witnesses and leaders to share resources and keep you uplifted through the rough spots.

2. Structure I am writing down what I eat and sticking to the guidelines set by Weight Watchers for someone my age and height. I also journal my feelings and treat myself with EFT tapping when I encounter stress or have a food craving.

3. I read food labels before buying anything and now choose things high in fiber, low in calories and low in fat. I am also consciously not eating foods that contain artificial sweeteners or high fructose corn syrup.

4. No sugar in my coffee. This may seem like a small thing, but it was keeping my body addicted to sugar. I only drink 1-2 cups per day, but when I do, I add a sprinkle of cinnamon instead.

5. Daily Exercise to manage stress and keep my body feeling good. I have been working out every single day for 30-60 minutes. Most days it is aerobics or running. At the very least, it is brisk walking. There are no days off and that is a good plan to work toward.

My big Ah-Hah came in realizing that this wasn’t as hard as I had been telling myself this would be. I have said NO to big portions, fatty/sweet treats and foods I might have ordered while dining out in the past. Once I see the calories or read a label, it usually doesn’t feel worth it because I know of a satisfying food that will work instead. I have said YES to more vegetables, sea food, fresh fruit, fat free yogurt and whole grains. I FEEL GREAT and I don’t feel deprived. You can do this too.

Figure out what you can do NOW and begin. I’m here to coach those who want more support and resources. Check out the Winning at Waist Management link on my calendar of events and plan to join me for the free class on Sept. 15 at 12:30 PM EST. See the Calendar of Events at www.theindigoconnection.com to get the details. Soon your “alien” will be shrinking too!

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Empty Nest – Now What?

Monday, August 23rd, 2010

As the kids head back to school, parents and especially the new empty nesters will experience a variety of changes which can bring with them a variety of emotions. My daughter returned to her second year of college this weekend and I find myself on a bit of an emotional roller coaster as I realize I have the house to myself again. It’s peaceful and it is also lonely. The energy has shifted and I’m getting used to it. There’s nobody to blame now. If I can’t concentrate – it is all my fault! It is a situation asking for some awareness, appreciation and balance.

I’ve been through this before and I know the up-sides. There is this giddiness about having more time to do what I want, to be more self-focussed and less structured. There is also a richer relationship with my husband and a true sense of pride that my kids are equipped to succeed, even without me around.

There are low points too. There is the new financial pressure of college bills, fewer family meal-times, smaller grocery lists and stillness where there was once so much banging and thumping. I seem to be tripping over the dog and cat constantly, as I am the only one they have left to follow around.

I was feeling so peaceful and a little lonely this AM in my empty nest…..till I got in the shower, washed my hair and realized my daughter had removed my favorite hair conditioner. As the anger boiled, I replaced it with gratitude. Things will stay where I put them till Thanksgiving!

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New Audio – Oct. 26 Lessons from The Closet

Tuesday, October 27th, 2009

Did you miss the live coaching call I held on Oct. 26 with professional image consultant Dawn Waldrop of www.best-impressions.com? Not a problem! I am pleased to share the recorded audio. This session will provide you with plenty of ideas for how to look & feel your best every day. How releasing clothes you don’t wear opens up so much more for you.

Enjoy the recording and feel free to share it with your friends. Our next live call will be November 30. Sign up for a reminder by joining my mailing list at www.theindigoconnection.com

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What’s Still in YOUR Way?

Tuesday, October 6th, 2009

How do you handle the roadblocks and perils life throws at you? One thing we can all be certain of is that we ALL will encounter some rough spots during our lives, no matter how well we balance and manage things. Perhaps this is why we are here – to learn from the bumps in the road and to grow more resilient with each peril we conquer.

Just about all of us have muttered “Why Me?” at some time in our lives. We think we know what we are doing and what we’re getting into, then suddenly get blindsided by a major set-back or nasty event. The real problem is that the “why me?” state of consciousness is a position of weakness. It comes from a victim perspective and suggests that there is no ownership nor possible control of the situation. Often that is far from the reality, but we are blind to it nonetheless.

A more “consciously aware” way to get traction on the bumpy road is to instead ask “What’s still in my way?” The answer is invited as we surrender to what is, and desire to know more.

If there is one thing I have learned as a coach, mother, wife, minister and human being is that often we need to move outside of ourselves to find the answers we need to navigate life. We all have blind spots, and I am no exception. Our egos get us all tangled up in our own pain.

While it can be embarrassing and humbling to ask someone else, or even pay someone, for perspective, counseling or advice, it is exactly what is needed to bring light to the situation. We don’t have all of the answers. Often we are just one resource short of a brilliant enlightenment!

So, here are a few questions for you to ponder and consider as they may apply to navigating the bumpy roads ahead:

1. Has there ever been a time when you were “blind-sided” or totally “clueless” to the reality of a situation to the point that it shut you down or held back your effectiveness? Describe the situation in a journal or in discussion with a close confidant. Why was it that this event caught you so off-guard? Were there any warning signs you missed? How might you avoid this situation in the future?

2. Are there any particular areas of your life where you seem to have blind spots or inability to see clearly into truth? What are they? How do you know they exist?Note: These are real clues to your life purpose. Take this very seriously because your response to this question can lead you to great happiness.

3. When you sabotage yourself, how are you most likely to do it? What snaps you out of it? Sabotage behaviors can include denial, overeating, clutter, substance abuse, overspending/debt, backing out of commitments and procrastination. Which one is your personal favorite? What benefits do you gain through self-sabotage?

4. How have external resources like teachers, coaches, mentors, friends, books, articles and family helped you better understand what holds you back? Do you prefer to explore your blocks alone or with other people? Consider what types of resources and people could assist you at gaining a better understanding of your self-sabotage behaviors or a challenge you are currently facing. Reach out and connect with some new perspectives with an open mind and see what you can learn.

5. What have you learned from the obstacles in your path? How might you keep that path clear going forward? You too can be a teacher and someone who can bring perspective to another colleague strugging with a similar problem. As you overcome your own troubles, put your learning into service for yourself and especially as a way to help others.

Know that there is always another perspective you can use to view your situation. Be brave enough to take a look at it, ask for help and release your fear about knowing the truth. As you do so, you’ll make great strides in your life, personal comfort and in serving the world.

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