Go Away! The Healing Power of Escape

July 13th, 2010

“Sometimes you must go away to find yourself and a true sense of peace”

I remember a time in early 2005 when I “hit the wall” – a term runners use to describe the sudden fatigue that hits so solidly that it makes it impossible to take another step. In my case, when this happened I realized that I was so worn-out that I needed to quit my job. I needed an extreme escape, but didn’t have the energy to plan anything elaborate. All I could come up with at that time was the promise to spend the next 30 days sleeping in, painting baseboards (the most mundane yet productive thing I could think of) and trying to find what was left of “worn out” me. I was smart enough then to know I needed to be in better form if I was to be inspired and guided to a better way of being.

I survived that rough spell and found some new tools to help me thrive. Today I run on a steady stream of high energy that allows me to be a leader in helping others heal, have fun and connect more fully to the world around them. Healthy escapes are fundamental pieces of my Healer/Coach tool-kit when working the energy and life-balance equation. In my experience they offer opportunities for enormous jumps in consciousness, huge jolts of joy and a massive recharge of the spirit. Whether you want to call them retreats, getaways, artist dates or romantic weekends, they offer support, structure, environment and inspiration for transformation, gratitude building and self-discovery.

There is additional magic when groups of women gather for supportive getaways. Studies have shown that women build their levels of the well-being hormone, oxytocin when they gather for friendship and support. Ladies, imagine what a weekend or full week with your girlfriends could do for you? I assure the husbands and boyfriends out there that women come back from these getaways ready to be more receptive to you too. Everybody wins!

When planning your escape, make sure whatever you choose supports you in building energy. Leave the distractions behind. In today’s world that means setting some boundaries before you go which can include turning off your cell phone and letting others know you are out of reach for a few hours or even days. Getaways that involve sleep deprivation, heavy alcohol and food consumption, gambling and credit card debt are not likely to bring the healing recovery you had in mind. Be careful about your choices and use the following questions to guide you in brainstorming some suitable getaway options.

WHO?

Do I need time alone? Is it time to connect with a special friend or a group? Does my marriage or romantic relationship need time for reconnection? Who would I choose as part of this escape and why? Who can help me pull the details together? Who’ll manage things for me while I escape?

WHAT?

What kind of places and activities have I been dreaming of? What activity level do I seek? What kind travel and accommodations can I afford? Will it be elaborate or something very simple? Will I choose to repeat a pleasant escape from the past?

WHEN?

Will this happen within a week, month, this year or beyond? Do I have vacation time? How long can I hope to be away? What season makes the most sense for what I want to do? Can the others I want to escape with get away when I’m free?

WHERE?

Is there a perfect place that will meet my needs? Am I seeking sun, warmth, water, nature, entertainment, shopping, history, sacred sites, learning or physical activity? What are some perfect places that are easy to reach? Is there someplace I have dreamed of visiting that has not yet become a reality?

WHY?

Examine your intentions fully. What do you really need from this escape?

And just in case you were wondering, I have many suggestions for getaways of all sizes. Here are some of my most favorites, including my comments:

Ohio Favorites

The Inn at Honey Run, Millersburg OH www.innathoneyrun.com

In the heart of Amish country, this has been a favorite place for my annual girls getaway to the Garden Symposium held in late January each year. My husband and I have also enjoyed wonderful romantic getaways here. Fall is absolutely heavenly.

Marblehead Peninsula / Lakeside, OH on Lake Erie www.lakesideohio.com

This historic lakeside community founded in the late 1800s is like stepping back in time. The energy here is incredible and healing. During the summer season (late June-Labor Day) you will pay a fee to enter, which includes admission to abundant educational and arts programming. One of my favorite girlfriend getaways is the Tour of Homes and Craft Show, held this year on July 22. Idlewyld B&B is a great place to stay, and also home base for The Indigo Connection’s annual women’s retreat, set for May 13-15, 2011. It’s also just a short distance from the ferry to Kelley’s Island www.kelleysisland.com where you can enjoy a day or exploring, biking, camping or dining near the water.

Geneva on the Lake / Ohio Wine Region www.visitgenevaonthelake.com

The wineries in this area are outstanding and reminded me of many we visited in Napa and Sonoma. My favorite place to stay is The Lake House Inn & Winery www.thelakehouseinn.com. They have a variety of beautiful rooms and suites, a home-cooked breakfast, a great restaurant and winery and a patio overlooking the water. This is the place for beautiful sunsets. Also recommended is The Eaglecliff Inn www.eaglecliffinn.com. Although not on the water, it has a great front porch for people-watching and a delicious hot breakfast each morning.

Sept. 18 Day Retreat – Beautiful Energy Women who want a great way to get away, enjoy girlfriend time and work on self-improvement will love the day retreat I am facilitating with image expert Dawn Waldrop in Valley City Ohio (southwest Cleveland suburb). You can get more details and enroll at http://avalon.websitewelcome.com/~theindig/webcal/view_entry.php?id=352&date=20100918

Other Recommended Destinations for Escape

Escape with Me to Maui! – The Maui Passage is a week of exotic experiences exploring the depths of the land, culture and history of this island. Join me the weeks of Oct. 17 or Feb. 13, 2011. Find more details at www.thepeacefulwoman.com and watch a video at www.youtube.com/watch?v=gLhlA1PPI9E&feature=related. Contact me by email for information on special discounts.

The Outer Banks of North Carolina

Niagara on the Lake – Ontario Canada www.niagaraonthelake.com

Lilydale Assembly, Lilydale NY www.Lilydaleassembly.com

Melbourne Beach, FL Port D’hiver Bed & Breakfast www.portdhiver.com

Sedona, AZ

Fort Lauderdale, FL The Pillars Hotel www.pillarshotel.com

Rick Steves European Vacations www.ricksteves.com

Note: whether you use Rick’s guidebooks or take one of the full tours, you are in good hands.

With a little planning and some good intentions you’ll return from your escape refreshed, energized and ready to take on some big, new challenges in life and in business. Bon Voyage!

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Happy 4th of July! Here’s my Fresh Blueberry Streusel Pie Recipe

July 4th, 2010

In case you haven’t noticed, blueberries are in season right now. I just purchased 4 pints at a market for only $5. I love blueberries and especially love making a fresh pie for guests this time of year. I wanted to share this very simple recipe with you so you can enjoy it too. If you bring this to a potluck or party, people will talk about it for years to come. You don’t have to tell how easy it was to make.

Betsy’s Fresh Blueberry Streusel Pie
1 prepared pie shell (I use Pilsbury Ready Crusts on busy holidays)
4 Cups Fresh Blueberries
2/3 Cup Sugar
1/4 C Flour
1 1/2 Tbsp. Lemon Juice
1/4 tsp. Cinnamon

Preheat oven to 450 degrees F. Mix berries, sugar, flour lemon juice and cinnamon in a large bowl. Place mixture into a 9 inch pie shell. and sprinkle with streusel topping (see below)

Streusal
2 Tbsp. Butter melted
3 Tbsp. Flour
5 Tbsp. Brown Sugar
1/2 tsp. Cinnamon
dash of salt

Bake for 10 minutes at 450 degrees, then lower heat to 350 and bake an additional 35-40 minutes. You may need to lightly cover pie with foil if topping should become too brown.
Serve warm with vanilla ice cream or fresh whipped cream. Enjoy!

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Ask and Receive (Repeat Often)

June 27th, 2010

Lately I have been feeling a lot like a beggar. You see, I went and entered a contest which required me to ask my friends, family, clients, associates and total strangers to vote for my book, Energy Makeover. Asking takes effort. Asking feels weak. Asking means I’m nothing without their help. Asking is humbling. I do it anyway, as hard as it is, because I know that asking is necessary to take a stand for what I am called to do.

Excuse me a second so I can take a moment to ask again – You see, the contest ends at Midnight on Monday June 28!

Will you help me?

Please vote for my book at http://www.nexttopauthor.com/profile.cfm?aid=799

I have also been doing a whole lot of receiving lately simply because I asked for help. Whether or not I make it as one of the 25 lucky authors who advance to Round 3 in the Next Top Author Contest, my heart has been warmed and my confidence stroked by hundreds of friends who wrote, called, texted and posted on my Facebook wall. When I asked for help, they responded and they did so with warmth and affection. Nobody threatened me, got mad or told me I was dumb. Why was I expecting that might happen? It does make me wonder if irrational thoughts and fears get in the way of my best experiences in other areas of life.

Due to this lesson in asking and receiving, I will choose to repeat both more often. I will do it anyway, even when I’m scared. Repeating a process that works is the real progress.

In summary, the lesson today is:

Asking takes effort. The return on the effort is enormous

Asking feels weak, but the weakness is temporary. Receiving soon restores the power and balance

Asking means I’m nothing without their help. Life is richest only through connection and service to others

Asking is humbling. I choose to remain humble

Whether I advance in the contest or not, my book will be published, people know what it’s about and they are excited about reading it when it becomes available. I call that a winner and I’m sticking with that!

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Having More Fun in Your Business

June 15th, 2010

On Monday June 14, I had the opportunity to be interviewed by Diane Helbig, host of Accelerate Your Business Growth Radio. Our topic was having more fun while running a business. You can listen to a recording of the show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/dhelbig/2010/06/14/having-more-fun-in-your-business

If you don’t have an hour to listen to the whole show, allow me to quickly share 6 key points that can help anyone begin to have more fun AND make more money as they align themselves in a business that reflects who they really are.

1. Know Thyself
Take time to get clear about who you are and what you love, both at work and outside of work. Think about your very best days on the job and why you enjoyed them so much. Take the test at www.superherotraining.com and see what comes up as your top 2 or 3 subject areas. Are these part of your business? Finally, think like a child and see if you can remember what made you happiest at the age of 8. Are those sources of joy still somehow connected to what you do now? The more you know what brings you happiness, the more you can attract it into your present model of fun.

When I took the superhero training test 4 years ago, I discovered “Nature” was my #1 category and it was nowhere in my business. Since that time, I have integrated nature into my work liberally by adding outdoor events, holding retreats at Lake Erie and becoming a facilitator for the TPW Maui Passage. By doing so, I have created so much more joy in my life.

2. Create Your Personal Definition of Fun
Fun is really up to you! Don’t limit yourself to what others say. Uncover your limiting beliefs about fun and test them. Could they change to allow you to enjoy work a bit more. I personally have transitioned from corporate employee to entrepreneur over the past decade. The stuffy nature of my previous jobs bled into my current situation and it really wasn’t me. I have gradually modified my definition of fun and professionalism, including my dress to be more casual and comfortable. This re-definition has served me well and is more authentic to my truth.

3. Narrow Your Focus to the “Fun Part”
Sometimes we struggle because we are working with the wrong partners or serving the wrong clients. Take a moment to become aware of you very best customers and how you are serving them. List the traits you appreciate about them and also the needs they hold in common. What might you do to attract more of this type of client? Simply getting more clear about your perfect client profile will create an energy field that invites them in.

4. Treat Yourself to Time-Off
Time for rest, renewal and personal fun is necessary to have perspective in the bigger business world. We benefit by stepping away from the hectic pace of our business to reconnect with ourselves. Use this time away to write, become inspired, read or do mundane tasks. It is not wasted time, but rather time that allows you to see new opportunities and to build energy so that when you return to work, you will be effective and fully-present.

5. Decide what you can “let go of” or release in order to have more fun and enjoyment.
Often you need to say “NO” to a few things in order to create space for true happiness. Examine those heaviest parts of your life or those things that seem to cause ongoing angst. Could something heal, stop, be released?
Some things you might consider releasing include:
Clutter
Debt
Employee/Partner problems
Customer disputes
Anger

6. Put something fun into every day
As you know yourself, you will benefit on even the busiest day by taking small steps for more fun. You might subscribe to funny videos, spend time in nature, add something enjoyable to your fitness routine or read a chapter of a fiction book purely for pleasure. As I said before, this is up to YOU.

Find something FUN and just do it!

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The Gift of Shift

June 11th, 2010

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Didn’t feel like writing today, so I made this little video instead. If you look closely, you’ll see my cat Sig sneak in at the end. I decided not to edit her out, since so many of my friends love her.

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New Audio – Authentic Action: Practical Marketing with Social Media

May 17th, 2010

Click on the link below to listen to the audio of tonight’s call

Recording of May 17 Teleconference on Social Media

The Indigo Connection’s May 17 Coaching Call was all about using Social Media in a conscious and deliberate way to market, serve and share information.

Betsy’s special guest this month was Kathleen Krug, owner of Massage Connection. Kathleen has been actively blogging at www.kathleenkrug.com and using social media in addition to her regular web presence at wwww.massageconnection.net She would enjoy connecting with new friends on Facebook or LinkedIn.

We mentioned a site for posting simultaneously to Facebook, Linkedin and twitter called Ping. The website for this is www.ping.fm and it is a really convenient way to share the constant contact newsletter I develop with my friends online.

Bottom line is to give it a try, set a time limit you are willing to dedicate to social media on a daily or weekly basis and then just do it!

Kat and I are very happy to be your friends and to answer your questions if you write on our walls. Give it a try and allow us to help you make sense of this incredible free marketing tool.

You can become my Facebook friend at http://www.facebook.com/betsy.muller. Check out the little links on this page to connect with me on twitter and linkedin too.

Enjoy your new friends and keep me posted on the great things that result from your outreach.

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The Energy of A Single Word

April 26th, 2010

Recently I found myself energetically ticked off – triggered by something totally unexpected. I have learned that this triggering of a sudden, strong emotional state is something that requires immediate attention and also a dose of healing self-care. I am sharing this story in hope that you might also relate and heal.

I regularly meet with a small group of trusted colleagues for a Mastermind lunch. We take turns leading the group and develop assignments as part of each meeting. At a recent gathering, we were asked to choose a single word to describe each of our group members, including one for ourselves. It was a simple assignment that was easy to complete. I arrived with my words, including the word “kind” to describe myself.

As we shared words that day, it was a pleasant experience until I found myself suddenly placed into an uncomfortable state by a single word given to me by a dear friend in the group. The word was “affluent” and the feeling was ugly. Why was a supposedly positive word doing this to me? Why did it feel so energetically opposite to the word “kind” that I had chosen for myself?

After lunch was over, I pondered this further. Perhaps I had misunderstood? Maybe there was something deeper within me that needed exploration? I grabbed the dictionary to check into the official definition:

af•flu•ent
–adjective
1. having an abundance of wealth, property, or other material goods; prosperous; rich: an affluent person.
2. abounding in anything; abundant.
3. flowing freely: an affluent fountain.

–noun
4. a tributary stream.
5. an affluent person: a luxurious resort appealing to young affluents.

I realized a big truth about my limiting belief quite quickly: For me, the word affluent is mostly about money. Connected to this belief is that I don’t see financial/material wealth being connected to character or kindness – and that character really matters to me. Finally, I realized that I believe affluent means having, but not sharing. Ugh! That doesn’t feel very nice either. I don’t think my mastermind friend intended any of those ideas to show up in my awareness, yet here they were.

Is there anything I agree with when it comes to being defined as “affluent”?

I absolutely agree that in the true sense of the definition that I am quite affluent. I have money and material wealth. I am great at managing finances, saving and investing. I am also great at creating abundance in all ways. I have learned and practice an approach to life that brings “free flow” – physical, material, financial, emotional and experiential energy flow. I am healthy, surrounded by supportive friends, satisfied with my work and generous in the way I give and serve. By choosing to embrace the word “affluent” is it possible that I could open up an even greater flow of abundance? Could healing this limiting belief open me up to some bigger, higher paying speaking opportunities I want to attract?

My awareness had changed and it was time to pull it fully into my energy system. Below are the affirmations I spoke out loud as I tapped my EFT treatment points. You may find these helpful to release your unknown resistance to being “affluent”.

I am financially affluent and manage my material wealth responsibly

I track, save and invest my affluence in ways that honor this very important reflection of energy.

I share abundance with others. There are always ways I can give when I have so much affluence.

I am surrounded by affluent relationships, reflected in my marriage, my family, supportive friends, mentors, colleagues and clients.

Affluent health is part of my being – I am comfortable, flexible, and fully alive in this body

I surround myself with an environment of affluence, natural beauty, color and physical possessions that are functional, clean, comfortable, delightful and exceptionally pleasing.

Creativity runs through me reliably and regularly. I download an abundance of beautiful ideas for the benefit of myself and every life I touch.

Spiritual affluence is an astounding part of my life. I reside in a sense of wonder as I am connected to a source of limitless abundance.

As I finished my self-care process, this beautiful thought came to me:
“My definition of affluent is a blessing that resides within me”.

I smile and know that I have reframed a belief and have transformed yet another block. All is well!

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Mastering the Art of Receiving: The Divine Download

April 19th, 2010

The following is the audio from Betsy Muller’s April 19 Live call. Those who listen closely will learn about an opportunity to RECEIVE something of high value. Will you dare to listen and find out what it is?

Here are the 8 tips I use for myself to boost my attraction magnet and activate a high frequency for receiving:
1. Ask!
2. Don’t set limits – be open to all sorts of results
3. Believe in a generous God
4. See receiving as a non-competitive process. There is plenty available for all of us.
5. Be grateful at every step
6. Have LOTS of fun while you dream, ask and create
7. Exercise your magnet with playful games
8. Get in touch with the feeling and experiences of asking and receiving. Say what you want out loud, publicly and with witnesses. It is a powerful way to tell the world what you are after.

A special thank you to Kathy Jiamboi from Creative Edge Marketing for helping me out with this call. She offers a great service to help businesses quickly connect with social media. Check out her website, www.ready2gocontact.com for client relationship management solutions.

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Ten Lessons from a Contest

April 11th, 2010

Recently, I decided to enter a competition. The Next Top Spiritual Author Contest was seeking spiritual writers and the prize was a big publishing contract. The first round of the competition involved posting an author profile with an audio or video book pitch, then asking everyone you know to vote. The 250 authors with the most votes on May 3 move to round two of the competition, and a chance for a big publishing contract with Hampton Roads.

Signing up was easy. I have a book in the works, Energy Makeover, which I am self-publishing for release in fall of 2010. I figured that a contest like this would be a great way to get the marketing buzz started and help me learn a few more things about social media. I also knew I needed to get more adept at making videos and wanted to try my hand at using my little camera and Microsoft Movie Maker to see what I could create.

Making this video stirred up all sorts of inner doubts, fears and turbulence in the week that followed. It was ugly, brought me an enormous migraine and introduced me to intense and unpleasant emotions that I am not used to having. How could I possibly call myself a self-care expert and the author of Energy Makeover when my own energy was spinning out of control?

The good news is that I got through it, posted the video and managed to make it into the top 150 authors on the first day I released my profile. The outpouring of support from my friends, clients and colleagues has been heartwarming. You can see my video and vote at http://www.nexttopauthor.com/profile.cfm?aid=799

As I reflect on this whole experience – both the highs and the lows, I recognize there are lessons here to point out. Perhaps they will help you with a big, ugly challenge you’re facing too.

1. Step Into Your Fear
Fear exists but need not stop you. Accept that it is there, then move into it with that first step. For me it meant turning on that video camera and recording. It meant doing what needed to be done, even if it felt scary. Just do it!

2. Serve Them
As I continued filming segments, I realized that it really isn’t about me but rather who I am serving – that audience of people who want to take better care of themselves and want some solutions to their imbalances, problems and symptoms. When you make the message about the customer or audience, you become a valuable player. That’s a more pleasant place to be.

3. Own Your Truth
I realized that my fears had to do with being afraid to reveal the real me, my appearance, and what I truly believe to that big unknown world of the web. What if my message made people uncomfortable? What if they think I’m too alternative? What if they dismiss or reject me completely? At some point I had to accept that not everyone will like or resonate with me and my message, and that is fine. I respect that everyone is free to have their own opinion. I will not allow those fears to change the message I convey. I am more effective operating from my place of truth. That’s where I’ll choose to stay.

4. Vulnerable is Okay
Putting a video up is kind of like going out naked in public. It is vulnerable in the most primitive way. I have learned that being vulnerable draws helpful people closer. They feel your pain & embarrassment. They resonate with your struggle. Your vulnerability makes you real to them and their heart soon lines up with yours. It feels scary, but it results in connection. I have had some marvelous conversations with some of my fellow authors this week as we shared our experiences with our contest entries. I soon discovered I was in good company.

5. Speak from the Heart
Passion is really what propels a message. As I watch the videos of others in the contest, that fire of enthusiasm speaks beyond words. You can find the energy within you to say what must be said and write what must be written when it comes from the heart.

6. There Will Be Set-Backs
Things will go wrong, computers will crash, files will disappear and batteries will die at the worst possible time. That’s how life is too. Know that something will probably derail you temporarily, and make the best of the situation. Take breaks, seek counsel and pray for a miracle. I actually lost the entire video the day I was ready to post it. The movie editing software failed to work and it appeared that all of my hard work was lost. I even took my computer over to an expert to check it out, only to discover that he couldn’t help the situation. After praying a bit more, I re-booted my laptop and miraculously everything appeared again. Divine intervention is always welcome in my world.

7. Persistence Pays
This was a bigger and more time-consuming project than I had ever imagined. I needed to learn to operate a camera, memorize my outline, utilize new software and make the final product satisfy my high standards. There were many moving parts and giving up was not an option. When you commit to something, stick with it till the end. You can’t expect miracles unless you demand a few from within.

8. Let Go
As much as I am a perfectionist and I could continue to edit my video for another week, there came a time when I just had to say it was done and post it to YouTube. It felt like jumping off a cliff without a net. My imperfect video went out to the masses as I gave it over to God to handle the rest. It was a relief to close that chapter. You can let go too. Is there something that you have been holding back until its perfect? Maybe it’s time to just put it out there and let God handle the rest.

9. Ask and Receive
Once the video was up, it was time to ask for support. Again, this was scary. I don’t like begging and bothering people. What if people ignored my requests? Again, I chose to just step into what needed to be done. I wrote to everyone on my email lists asking for support. I also posted requests of Facebook, LinkedIn and Twitter in addition to having small business cards with the link printed so I could request votes as I met people at meetings and events. It was delightful to receive replies from all corners of the world from people I hadn’t heard from in years supporting me and complimenting my entry. It was an outpouring of pure love I had not expected. I embraced it and continue to do so as each happy response comes my way. It is important to ask for help and it is equally important to receive it with open arms of gratitude. What a wonderful feeling that complete cycle brings!

10. Enjoy the Ride
I had no idea how much fun all this struggle would bring. I have attracted new friends, renewed older relationships, humbled myself by asking for support and extended my network of connections through the challenge of this contest. People now know me better than they did and there is interest in my new book. The ride is now and I’m here having this great experience. You’ve got NOW too. Notice how your body feels and the emotions that accompany your story as it unfolds. You may want to write it down in your blog or journal to capture the beauty of the moment. Enjoy all that life brings you, the highs and the lows. All of it will transform your soul.

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I Am Indigo!

March 28th, 2010

Over the weekend I was busy pulling together my PowerPoint presentation and handouts for the workshop I will be presenting at the 2010 ACEP Conference in San Diego. The workshop is about creativity, a topic very dear to me.

To organize my thoughts, I spent several hours in my sunroom going through all the notes and journal entries I have compiled while facilitating 8 different Artist’s Way with EFT Groups. It was fun to re-live each experience and to remember each group member who taught me so much as we shared, healed and grew as creators. Each one of them will be part of the workshop I’ll deliver on June 6 – “Release the Awesome Creator”.

I was particularly moved by something I wrote months ago in response to an exercise that require us to describe ourselves as a color. Of course I chose Indigo!

Allow me to share the paragraph with you:

I am Indigo -the consciousness that translates the light and energy of God into the practical physical world of human daily life. I am gentle as the night sky and as deep as the sea. A rare color in nature, possessed by only a few flowers and living creatures. Ushering in a new age of being and consciousness.

Choosing to integrate the color and the word Indigo into my business name happened rather easily back in 2005, long before I wrote this paragraph.

Indigo is a beautiful blue color that I wear often and look great in.

Indigo represents the 3rd eye chakra – intuition. My work as a coach, healer and helping professional relies on intuition more and more each day.

Indigo has within it “Indi” that brings to mind “independence” which was certainly the case when I chose to become an entrepreneur. It also contains the word “go” suggesting motion and forward movement. Those of you who know me will agree that I rarely sit still for any length of time.

Finally, I am fascinated with the stories about the Indigo children – these special little ones who have a sense of deep spirituality beyond their years.

Am I an Indigo in that sense too? Perhaps. I tend to think there’s some Indigo in all of us waiting to be activated. A series of strange coincidences, people and experiences activated the Indigo in me, yet I think my understanding and identification with this force was always there lying dormant, beneath the surface.

Thoughts and ideas exist before they emerge into physical reality too . Creativity is like that – a birthing of something that already exists. Our job as creators is to catch the divine download and bring it into reality.

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